Wed, 21 Feb 2018 21:45:34 GMT
What we've learned from the research is that we all seek different kinds of support. Our expectations may be different from the support that we are given.
Are we present with the person seeking help? Are we providing advice? Did the person ask for advice or feedback?
Does the person want you to listen or to challenge his or her thoughts? The next time that you are providing support to a friend, think about what kind of support for which the person is asking.
Richman, Rosenfeld, and Hardy (1993) refer to several sources of support linked to well-being and recovery from sports injuries.
Listening support: We are able to share without providing advice and judgment.
Emotional support: We perceive that the listener is caring, thoughtful, and understanding our perspective.
Emotional challenge: This occurs when we challenge the listener's values, attitudes, and feelings.
Reality confirmation: We are able to confirm our beliefs with the listener.
Task appreciation: We acknowledge and appreciate the listener's support and feedback.
Task challenge: We are challenged to approach a task in a different way.
Richman, J.M., Rosenfeld, L.B., & Hardy, C.J. (1993). The social support survey: a validation study of a clinical measure of the social support process. Research on Social Work Practice, 3, 288-311.